Causes And Cures Of Crying

All the causes and cures of crying that were suggested for the newborn baby may still apply to this older one. But there are some new aspects to consider now, too.

Sucky Babies

Some babies are better soothed by sucking than by anything else and it may be difficult to distinguish the need to suck from the need to feed. If a breast- or bottle-fed baby is fed “on demand” but needs extra comfort sucking, he may already be able to suck his own hands. Encourage him by helping his fist to his mouth a few times and by making sure you do not wrap his arms so that he cannot reach that precious thumb. If he is going to suck something, his own hands are much the best: always available and far more hygienic than anything you can provide. Thumb sucking usually comes later, though. Most babies cannot yet get their hands to their mouths or get satisfactory suction on a tiny digit.

Pacifiers

If your baby cannot or will not suck his fingers, you could give a pacifier. It is rare to suggest pacifiers, but there is no doubt that they can make a miraculous difference to a few miserable or jumpy babies. Let us look at some pros and cons:

Advantages

Disadvantages

If the baby takes to it, the pacifier will soothe him to sleep, or soothe him after a fright.

Once he is used to it he may not be able to do without it. He may want it for years. Can you stand the look of it?

If he sleeps with a pacifier in his mouth, disturbances will make him start sucking again (thus soothing himself) rather than waking him right up. If the pacifier falls out of his mouth in the night, he may wake and cry for it. He will not be able to find it for himself so he will always need your help in going back to sleep.

A pacifier will probably mean that he will not take to sucking his thumb. If he often has a pacifier in his mouth, it will prevent him from putting toys, etc., in his mouth, which he must do in order to explore them properly.

Unless you are very fussy about sterilizing them, pacifiers are unhygienic.

Unless you are very careful, you will find yourself shoving the pacifier in his mouth everytime he is unhappy, instead of trying to find out what is the matter.

On balance it is probably better to try to do without a pacifier altogether, but if your baby is really miserable, you could try giving one for a few months, at bedtime only. Peaceful evenings and nights may raise the morale of the whole family. If the baby is a happier person by around six months, you could try taking it away altogether before the baby is old enough to remember it or miss it for long. It is at the crawling and toddling stages that pacifiers seem most unaesthetic, unhygienic and limiting to a child’s explorations. Whatever you decide about pacifiers, don’t compromise with a small bottle filled with sweet drinks. These are the shortest road to rotted first teeth; there is also a risk of your baby sucking and gagging while asleep. If you want to give your baby a drink, give it in a bottle on your lap.

Wakeful Babies Who Are Bored

A lot of your baby’s crying may be due to your expecting him to sleep more often and for longer periods than he needs. He may be a baby who needs much less sleep than average – remember that some three- and four-month-old babies never sleep for more than 12 hours in the 24. Or you may not yet be able to get on with life when he is around, so that you keep trying to tuck him away.

If he is a very active baby (and many wakeful ones are), the physical restrictions of wrappings and covers will frustrate him. When he must be alone in his crib or stroller, try leaving him free to kick. If the weather is cold, a baby bag will keep him warm without restricting him too much.

Even with freedom to move around, he will get very bored if he spends a lot of time alone but awake. Interesting things to look at, swipe at and eventually touch will do a great deal to keep him happy. If he has always slept on his stomach, try putting him on his back with his stroller under a tree or near your dancing laundry or with lots of interesting objects hung close over his crib and changed frequently.

Even interesting objects are no replacement for people. If your baby spends a lot of time awake but alone, he is probably crying because he is lonely. After all a baby who is asleep in the yard does not know that he is alone; a baby who is awake is alone and conscious of it. If you take him into the family circle whenever he is awake, the excess crying may stop overnight. You are fascinating your baby and so is everything that you do. When you are doing simple jobs around the house or yard, he will enjoy being part of you and your activities from the vantage point of a carrier on your back. When you cannot carry him, there are lots of other ways to arrange for him to feel part of your activities, now that he is old enough to be propped up. Try to get in the habit of telling him what you are doing.

He can be propped in his carriage with a cushion under the mattress and the carriage parked close to you. He can sit in his infant seat close to the sink or the dining table or wherever you are working. No matter how tedious the chores you are doing, they will not bore him. You may be fed up with peeling potatoes but he has never met a potato before; introduce him.

When he is tired of being propped, a rug on the floor is an ideal playground unless your home is full of dogs and toddlers. He will not watch television but he will be happy to watch you doing yoga or vacuuming. But perhaps the best of all solutions for older wakeful babies is a baby bouncer. A canvass seat harness attached by elastic cords to a door frame or ceiling hook gives him a perfect all-around view of the world and, at the touch of his toes on the floor, a delightful freedom to dance and twirl and jump. . . . Baby bouncers make miserable babies happier and happy ones happier still. As soon as your baby can manage to hold his head and upper back straight he can begin to learn his world from this entrancing new angle.